Sunday, 6 October 2019

It’s not falling down that matters,it’s getting back up that counts!

This image made me really smile this morning, I had woken up feeling nearly human determined to have a good Sunday,happily making our cup of tea and getting my cooking station ready for soup making later. Then I saw my beautiful flower stem broken and a little droopy. I smiled to myself because if I am completely honest this is just how I am feeling today.

The second week of being the carer hasn’t been as easy this is understandable as I started week 1 all fresh and ready to go week two I started absolutely knackered, as usual there has been tears and quite a few, I haven’t actually grown gutters down my cheeks yet and I am still deep down cheerful. I just have to accept when this get a bit too much for little old me my eyes leak they always have and probably always will.

I have had times this week when I have been overcome by how much kindness and love people have been showing, I have really enjoyed wrk this week I was really not sure how I was going to manage I didn’t feel prepared enough and didnt know if physically my body would be able to do it.

I arrived on Wednesday and a very special person had set up the room for me I really did feel like a princess all I had to do was what I do best sit and talk. Thursday was the same and even came home Thursday with a soup made for us both. Thursday afternoon and evening I fought hard to stay awake but you know what next week I am going to bed after lunch as I obviously need more rest than I am having.

Friday I thought I got this list of jobs in hand off I trot. Parsnips roasting in my convection microwave which is truly amazing, it’s a grill a oven a microwave and any combination I would like it to be. It’s at a height I can put things in and get things out by myself. I did two different types of sups for Clive and to be honest was feeling rather pleased and a title bit smug I got this cooking lark can do anything now I have taken the time to learn how to use my oven.

Ok I thought let’s make a batch of apple and cinnamon muffins I love them, apple grated just got scales in my hand to weigh my oats all I had to do was one step, one little step across the kitchen where I don’t have anything to hold, that just had to be the point when my right quadriceps muscle thought nope can’t do anymore, it did no more than just that relaxed all muscle power gone, neither leg can support me on their own so over I go. Does Amanda fall like a normal person no of coarse not I fall forwards I can’t quite get my arms down either so the point of contact with the kitchen floor was left eyebrow then left hand and left shoulder. There is very little muscle or padding on my shoulders so not a soft landing.

Then the fun starts, we have a system Clive and I , I say I am alright it’s ok which is code for that bloody hurt but please don’t try to move me yet, or I am bleeding but ok same as the first or am hurt which basically means whatever you do Clive I am going to hurt so just get me up please. The problem we had was Clive can’t get me up, ha ha did the stop us nope. I managed to get to a sitting position and kinda walked on my bottom to the bedroom one cheek at a time, took ages. Then Clive lowered my bed to the floor and I got on my knees not sure how, this is the genius bit Clive very slowly raised the bed and I managed to move my feet inch by inch until my legs where straight and my belly was laying on the bed. Just typing this I really don’t know how my legs did that and what a site I must of been. I then used my cot side to be able to stand up.

Job done apart from the tears obviously it is me, I did finish the flipping muffins too, I was so determined it wasn’t going to stop me doing my jobs so I could go to camera club. Which I did and really enjoyed myself.

Yesterday was going to be a rest day my body was a little bit sore, however Seabass had other ideas she was being I little rascal but to be fair to her i hadn’t had chance to take her for a walk fr two days. Of we trotted and I was having a lovely time just thinking what a beautiful sunny day it was when......disaster number two happened. Seabass saw some horse poo, now I think to a bulldog this is like me seeing a massive chocolate brownie, she was off backwards towards the road, me in the chair going forwards so she pulled me over to the left side the arm rest of the chair flipped up I really thought I was falling out the side, so I kinda threw my body over to the right unfortunately my right hand was holding the controller, this meant I shot forwards at full speed until I hit a garden wall. How I didn’t fall out forwards I really don’t know. Seabass’s lead around the wheel again. This time a lady did come and help me. I smiled and thanked her and drove off  after a checked the wall was still standing. Seabass sulked the rest of the walk and I tried to relax and not cry. To put the icing on the cake when I came into the house unfortunately so did half the dirt from the village.

I now have a muddy carpet, a bent wheelchair and properly fed up and a very sore body, I did what I do best tried to carry on and started crocheting my ELF and called my mum n dad to come and help which they did, do feel bad they both 81 and still looking after me.
Today I am not surprisingly very sore muscle wise but I am also very happy and so excited, I have done Clive a soup made with frozen veg no peeling or chopping mash potato done to go with my fish and veg have obviously sat doing this blog which I love doing, i remember saying if it helps just one person I will be happy, well it is it’s helping me.

The excited bit ,I truly can’t type fast enough ,Clive my supper duppa best friend ever has booked for us to go to Wembley on Dec 22nd to see Elf again yippee but that’s not all we are going backstage to see the cast oh my goodness I am going to meet Elf . Just need a baby sitter for Seabass she never any trouble. So this afternoon I am going to do some more crochet and I am definitely resting all day.

It doesn’t feel like it this weekend but as my mug says I am winning at life.

1 comment:

Chris Calverley said...

What an inspiration you two are! When I saw you on Friday evening I had no inkling of the traumatic day you had been having. That idea of using the bed as a lift was pure genius. Wow!