Thursday, 12 September 2019

I am back to feeling amazing yipee

Well what a difference just 4 days have made, I really don’t enjoy feeling low but I have learnt through past experience that pretending to myself that I am ok when I clearly am far from it doesn’t actually help me.

The first step to me feeling better was realising I must be struggling as it really isn’t me to binge eat like I had been doing. I had stopped doing the things my body needs rest rest and letting my mind rest too.

I have given myself a bit of slack talked to friends about my feelings and fears. The next 6 weeks are going to be challenging, Clive will be the cared for one . It does make me feel panicked can I ,will I cope. I had got lost in those feelings so I couldn’t see how I was going to manage.

Every day I have really tried to focus on the positives in my life, have done my favourite thing made lists of the things I need to do and arrange the help we are going to need. I have felt really blessed all the offers of help we have had and I have promised myself I will ask for help.

I have just really impressed myself by learning how to scan recipes onto my iPad so I can then have all my favourite recipes in one place. It is something that I can do but flipping heck to me the iPad is heavy so gonna probably ask mum or Clive to spend a couple of hours helping me do them over the weekend.

The iPad is still causing me problems but that is because me being me thinks I should be able to be a professional secretary kinda wizz in a week.

So today when we arrived to set up for my Thursday Slimming World Group I had a fab idea. I thought it would be so nice and relaxing to take Seabass onto the field to have a good run around while Clive unpacked the car. It was amazing (yea I must be feeling better I used the word amazing) the freshly cut grass smelt beautiful the air was cool but crisp. Apart from the traffic the world was so quite. I actually felt free and alive, Seabass and I just ran around the field it was great.....until I noticed how much grass was stuck to the wheels oops.
I did drive around the car park and get a lot of the grass off however it did cause a giggle because as the grass dried it kept falling off all over the floor, Clive followed me around with a sweeping brush bless him . I would love to say he did it with a smile but that would be expecting just too much.

I have spent the evening in my pjs relaxing looking at my cooking books, my plan for the weekend is to make sure I spend time appreciating the little things and keep telling myself I can and I am doing this. One of my pictures from the zoo, I was surprised how quick he could run.
Progress is Progress

1 comment:

Sassa said...

Go girl.... just ask.xx